Hurt. :o\

I am an emotional eater, so it's a good thing I don't really have anything yummy/bad in the house right now.

I went swimming last night with two of my friends, and one of them told me something that bothered me. I don't blame her, because I wanted to know, but I do feel hurt.

One of the new friends I made last year, I'll call her "Lily," just suddenly stopped wanting to hang out with me, and I didn't know why. But last night, another friend who I'll call "Georgia" (who Lily also stopped hanging out with) told me that Lily had said that I was "too needy" and she felt like she couldn't leave, so that that was why she stopped coming to my house.

I admit I was so happy to have company that I was always really disappointed when it was time for them to leave, but I could tell Lily felt pressured, so I stopped saying anything about it. I actually said I wouldn't say anything about it anymore. She seemed to appreciate that, and I thought we were okay. But I think that's the last time she came over. So I stopped doing what bothered her, but it didn't make any difference. In fact, when I said I wouldn't pressure her, is when she stopped coming over altogether. ??? I don't get it.

The reason this came up is that Lily stopped hanging out with me and Georgia ever--she stopped coming swimming, she would make excuses for why she couldn't go to movies or for coffee, etc. Last year she was calling us her best friends (we hadn't known each other that long, so I found that weird--dare I say "needy?" LOL). We saw her a couple times in group situations over the past year--the 5K, her birthday--but nothing really more than that. Georgia removed her from her Facebook, and Lily got insulted about that. But what did she expect?

About the 5K, Lily got mad at me because one of the other girls and I went back into the building to get our free t-shirts, and when we came out, we found out that Lily and yet another girl in our group had gone back inside. It was a huge building, and it was packed. My husband wasn't feeling well and wanted to leave, and we had promised my friend (yet another member of our 5K group) who was with us a ride home, and she had to leave because she was going to a singing competition that night. Lily was mad that I didn't go back in and find them so that I could say goodbye. I didn't have time! She even wrote me a FB message about it, but I see that it's gone now, so she must have deleted it at some point. (I mention this because I found it weird and demanding at the time).

None of this makes all that much sense to me. I don't think I'm all that needy of a friend--I used to be, honestly, when I was younger, but now I just let friendships slip away if that's what the other person seems to want. Which I pretty much did with Lily, although before I found out about this "needy" thing I thought I'd give it one last shot, so I messaged her a few days ago and asked her if she might ever want to get together. She didn't answer, and now that I know about how needy I supposedly am, I wish I hadn't sent it!

Anyway, I kind of don't want her on my Facebook anymore, seeing as she's not actually my friend (or old classmate or old co-worker or online friend or relative) and all, but I don't want the drama that Georgia got when she removed her and another friend (who is now close friends with Lily). And did Georgia ever get drama! Hoo boy! Also, Lily is still a friend of a friend. So I don't know what to do.

And this is why I say, I'm not so good at that whole friend thing. I feel down about it all, which is really not something I need right now.

I've been doing okay for food today, although I haven't counted (but I have measured most things)--oatmeal for breakfast, scrambled eggs for lunch, a tiny bit of bread--that's it. I'm quite hungry. I believe dinner will be Mexican. We have one of those super coupons for it. Dessert will most likely be grapes. I desperately wanted sushi for lunch, but my husband refused to lift my sushi moratorium (bastard!), so I still have to wait for the weekend. *sigh* Why did I agree to this!?